Lucas Sims and Lucas Simms: Alike, but Different

Lucas Sims

Lucas Simms, mayor/sheriff of the post-apocalyptic town of Megaton in the year 2277.

Lucas Simms

Lucas Sims, Atlanta Braves pitching prospect

About the two men pictured above, certain truths are absolute:

  • They are, physically, precisely identical.
  • They share the morally superior middle-name “Sundberg.”
  • They were both living in Cheektowaga, New York when the storm of 1977 hit, and both lived through the blizzard by way of an intricate beans rationing system. However, neither one was aware of the other’s presence in Cheektowaga, New York during the storm of 1977.

Given the above truths, it is entirely reasonable should one convince oneself that these are not two men at all. Rather, one might convince oneself, they are very obviously one single entity. Well, listen up, oneself. You are wrong, and thus you are a muttonhead.

The man in the top photo is Lucas Simms, who is the sheriff and also the mayor of Fallout 3’s Megaton. For reasons obvious, he wears a baseball uniform and poses for photographs as a pitcher come set.

The man in the bottom photo is Lucas Sims, who is a pitching prospect in the Atlanta Braves organization. He entered the season ranked as baseball’s 64th best prospect by Baseball Prospectus. For reasons obvious, he wears the uniform of a cartoon cowboy and carries a large, futuristic weapon across his back.



About Joshua Allen-Worrell

Joshua Allen-Worrell is a very part-time writer. He did not graduate from the University of Virginia with a degree in economics in 1989. He did, however, poop in a diaper that year. Josh is a fan of the Atlanta Braves and the name Zoilo Almonte. He often makes tweets as @oldseacaptain.
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